She took her pants off in front of me
She battled and conquered a mighty spider
I’ve decided that she’s a wizard. She can fold a fitted sheet perfectly
She took her pants off. In front of me
We talked about our breasts
We discussed tattoos
We got excited about old doors
She took her PANTS OFF
We made each other gag
We made each other laugh
She wants to hug my ass
SHE TOOK HER PANTS OFF
Best. Girl date. Ever.
What can I say? You make me want to take my pants off.
The day can’t come fast enough when I live alone. Well, the 4 y/o and I that is.
And when will my ex quit fucking texting me to tell me about things he’s doing?! Yes, let’s be civil with each other, friendly even, but we’re getting a divorce for a reason. I don’t want to talk to you every day, let alone five times a day.
Why do the penises in my life not get it? I’m not expecting them to be mind readers, which is why I always say what’s on my mind.
Just go the fuck away for awhile. Please.
At 5am I let her climb in with me. Now I’m on the edge of the bed and she’s right here, on my pillow and against me, and there are four feet of bed space on the other side of her.
She’s lucky she’s cute.
Just crawled into bed with my phone and my laptop and a glass of water. I don’t see this ending well for any of them.
At least I know how to party. Hard.
Bought fabric for curtains. My mom said it wasn’t bad, a girlfriend said it looked like a designer threw up on fabric, a coworker said it looked like I wanted to live in the 70s, and the 4 y/o said “It has flowers. It’s awesome.”
I’m with you, kid.
Got home to find our sunflower had started to grow! She was pumped, but gave me her “hurry up with the fucking picture, mom” smile.
And now she’s running around saying she’s Spiderman and would I like chips or lettuce for dinner, because Spiderman is a great cook.
Love.
FUCK.
Fr-eye-day + five
1) Tomorrow I get a day to myself. I’ll be cleaning my house (the sold one), emptying the garage, doing some freelance photography and hopefully some laundry, but it’s at my leisure. Or non-leisure, but still.
2) Last night I relaxed for 2.5 hours on the couch. I didn’t move. And I tried not to let myself feel guilty. It sort of worked.
3) I’m trying to just deal with the fact that I won’t have sex again for a long time so my body will shut the hell up about it. So far it’s not working.
4) I really need to get curtains.
5) Exacerbate is one of my favourite words. For instance, all the hotness that gets posted around here only serves to exacerbate #3.
